Facing the Fear Like a Queen

I just finished a chapter-by-chapter outline of my current work in progress … and I’m scared.

I’m scared because I have four main characters (one a little main-er than the others) and four points of view I care about so much.

I’m scared because I outlined 67 chapters. What? I didn’t see that coming.

I’m scared because I feel like I’m being called to write this book and that’s much scarier than just wanting to write a book.

I’m scared because I cried outlining my last few chapters, and those weren’t even real prose words—it was a chapter summary, and it made me emotional.

I’m scared because sh*t just got real, and the first word of the first sentence of the first paragraph of the first chapter of the first draft starts tomorrow, and I’m in it now.

I’m scared … but it’s waiting-on-line-to-ride-a-rollercoaster scared. I’m scared, and I’m excited.

Here’s what I’m not scared of. I’m not scared of rewrites. I’m not scared of not getting everything right on the first pass … and I’m definitely not scared of getting some things right. I’m not scared to let events and characters show up that I didn’t plan for. I’m not scared of hard work.

I’m scared of the unknown, but I’m comfortable with the known, and that will get me through the draft.

It’s time to face the fears … like a queen.